yesterday,
celebrate carol birthday. den i ren one ma one pa one ah ma and one ah gong. lol... den as i company they all go take pay. my brain is thinking of her. but nv sae out. frends when u all c i biting can. i m thinking of her. not i like 2 bite.

we meet at bugis at 4.30. but my ma late. den my ah gong ah ma also. haiz, den suddenly as i shop i saw e coffin de handphone pouch. den i think of her again. i remember i told her if one dae i got enuff money i will buy that 4 her. but nw? den i keep looking at the coffin handphone pouch til i saw e cigg box. den i think back thats once i m very angry coz she smoke alot. den til she dun wan eat. den thinking back, will she listen 2 me?

i dunno y i keep thinkin of her. hai. den we go marina bay 2 eat. den quite a lot of ppl la. den i go take a puff and tell my ah gong my prob. haiz. so wad e use? i still keep thinking of her. den they chat chat, and i suddenly think back that dae at chalet. den see my ah gong ah ma, papa mama. i realli wanna turn back the clock where i hug her, and stay at that time forever.but i knw its impossible.


when i went home i call pearl, i mean she call mi 2 chat. but in e end i make her sad, coz of my missing her, sorry pearl.
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y200/Jeassea/my%20other%20pics/wp5_800.jpg

missed you @ 9:20 AM

* * *

todae TKD very shiok... manage 2 learn some of my pattern. happi sia.
den got sparring, finalli spar wit my dream guy. daniel. but he nv spar real de so sad. honestly he quite hard to fight.den my body hurt alot. cos spar plus gym work out yesterday.
this few daes still crying.. still miss her lo. haiz dunno when can gv up.
den my heart quite confuse lo. scare will fall for the wrong gal.. anyway b coz wei hao de words. he sae when sum1 lose a love one will eventually more easy to fall in love again. so b coz of wat he sae. i realli muz think thru lo. dun wan another mistake. sumtime i feel cant rush sumtim reali confused. haiz...

suyu
u found ur love one treasure it k. as ur sis. i dun wan u 2 b sad. so b happi k?? not i dun like her la.. is juz that not sure yet. i dun wan hurt ppl. den 4 nw i wan treat her gd. but dunno y when i c her sian sian i will wanna tok 2 her lo.. i onli wanna know her better 4 now. and if she is e gal den i will choose her de. and try 2 forget my ex lo... sumtime realli dunno if i use her 2 replace my e or wat. i dun wanna hurt her feeling lo. k??

mai sei
dun worry, althou i change. but i still regard u all as my frend lo... hai.. try my best le.. sumtimes my attiutude bad dun blame me k?

weihao
thanks 4 wat u done.. we as bro try to help each other k?

xinhui
if u likehim juz go. xin fu zai ni shou zhong. k?? anything can tell kor

pearl
sorry make u angry last nite. erm, sori sori still frend rite?? hee.. my milktea ar

vanessa(aka jeassea aka zhu dou aka mao dou)
u ar.. muz try to catch up mentally k?? er... dat boi i think not worth ur frend la.. k.. den next time b gentle a little bit more can?? den i wont so scare u. ang mo ghost, anyway, er... any prob tell mi k.. wish our cafe can realli cum true k?

missed you @ 9:01 AM

* * *

hey hey... todae went 2 james huse sing. produce le wei hao new song. quite ok la.. mayb is my drum beat not gd enuff... hai, den james not himself todae. like got problem lidat,den everi1 have some prob lo.

Pearl:
if u have prob tell me. i may not b able to understand or even know. but i dun wanna c u sad, as u my frend, c u sad i also not happy. if u cry again b cos of him. not worth it lo. understand. u told me to na de qi fang de xia. u muz also k?

suyu:
to me i realli dono how 2 choose. i own very blur le. between they three. hai. den he also nw so close 2 mi. den i dono wad 2 do. i wan they 2 together. but, haiz... i dono how 2.

missed you @ 7:55 AM

* * *

todae went 2 school giv pearl e poster. but they until 10 den cum. den pearl face whole black black de. from snow white to justice bao . lol... den i help her paste le.. give her e gift i wrapped 4 her.FOUND OUT SOMETHING WOR, i no taste when choosing gift for gals.lol...

den go class le cum down. saw she sell most of the product quite happy lo. dunno y see she happy i also happy in e heart . lol...den company her awhile. den go james huse. over there saw his drum.

i was so attracted 2 the drum i sitted there nv cum out of the seat sia. den we help wei hao a lot of song. den james ask me smoke wit him den i pei him. he tell mi all his prob.den i ask him try 2 forget lo.. hai.. so sad.

reach home le. call pearl ask if she like the present den suddenly miss her again. den keep crying. but when pearl ask i sae nv hai. so useless.

missed you @ 9:00 AM

* * *

hey.,.. todae quit a good dae.. ask xin hui pei me go sembawang eat. den meet lincoln. he got into sum trouble.. we go S21 2 eat. over there got ppl wanna beat me.. but rite now dun dare touch me... XIAO MATT cum straight 2 me. if u dare.

lincoln anyway got there at 6.30pm. me and xinhui go shop at SSC. for the project and the poster i promised pearl. den at 6.30 we go over S21. eat there, smoke there drink there. lincoln lie 2 e auntie sae he 18 and buy a calsberg 2 drink, and a cigg to share wit me.. but i still thinking of her.

shin hui told me alot of trouble she has. den i bo bian ask her lean on my shoulder. haiz.. poor gal.... haiz... den i also told her my prob lo... haiz

missed you @ 8:49 AM

* * *

another dae... hai yesterdae call her to check on her. hai. very weird. brk le.still hold on 2 tis relationship like a fool lidat. dunno when can totally forget her. hai.

todae was late 4 school. saw fernades. den i remember meeting pearl. den i saw fernades stead. den i ask pearl if reach school dun cum cafeteria. hai dunno i wori so much 4 wat. but when pearl reach she went out le.. hai.. wori 4 nth. den i company her a while den go up 2 class.

wei hao sick le.. so sad my bro sick liao.. den he sae wanna style hair. but so sori dat i company pearl den i forget 2 help u.linda borrow hp from me. den when during the OIT lesson. my head super pain lo. den i walk out straight from the class ignoring wad teacher sae. dunno ... mayb 2 miss her ba. so fan. den meet pearl and linda 2 take back my phone. den went 2 pearl huse. see she make the chocolate de bag so xin ku. lol.. zhen ke lian. hai. den took 2 pic of her. one like ghost and one like ah ma. lol... but first time see her so yong gong.

now chatting wit her, she reminded me sumthing. when i company her go east point. we walk past this bangalow. den the dog keep barking. i thou it bark at hu. den i saw its eyes. guess wat.. it was looking at pearl. den i psycho her. dat the dog look like her. den, e dog tiam tiam liao. i guess the dog also think so. dats y keep looking at her . so mayb pearl u shud think of adopting a dog. that look like u.

but 2 serious, dunno y tis few daes so sad.. hai.. guess its time i start my life afresh ba.. dunno.. here sae but mind still thinking of her. anyway.. thanks evryone... friday NAFA.. buaiz

missed you @ 8:32 AM

* * *

hey yo... todae was quite a nice dae, went 2 school for S n W. den wear whole addidas uniform go. den after that meet pearl and linda 2 go eat. eat buffet or rather sushi. b4 going der den i take a stick of cigg from lincoln. den he keep psychoing pearl saying she very short. den pearl sae he not very tall. aiya they 2 ar... hai.. den linda keep asking xinhui(lao mei) about she n david. den i tiam tiam. pearl also. hai... dun care le not my problem. lol..

den reach TPI den lincoln go take 969 go back. he ask mi got time go sembawang play LAN. not i dun wan but is i scare i saw her lo.. hai. try. den when i reach TPI i introduce lincoln 2 david. den david go out with xinhui. den mi and pearl plus linda. hai, ya.. i think fridae got NAFA, 2.4. muz train le. dun wan fail again. lol..

pearl, i think she quite angry and sad coz yesterdae she ask mi go i tell her not confirm. but pearl ar.. i still got go ar.. still got eat ar. lol.. but hope u happi la. k? hee i dun wan u sad leh.kee.. btw ya. den we go hougang mall eat. suki sushi. quite nice. hee.. linda keep eating none stop. b4 went in linda call hao. he quite sick so nv cum nvm lo. den eat alot. den i keep eyeing the octopus. lol.
in e end got 2 eat it.. so xin fu

den we went 2 k box. every song i sing de, lol.. but e song i like most is the hei you lun de"ling" and wilber de"bu de bu ai" very nice, especially pearl sing the bu de bu ai. hee pro le lo... lol...
hee.. i tink or rather i feel she quite happy lo. but reali waste a lot of money. lol.. after going out with them. i went 2 shop. 4 wat neh?? hehe.. pearl de present lo... i want 2 buy tis ting which is $56. but i scare latr she knw sure scold me de.. hai.. so i finalli stop at 1 that is $45. lol... but i think i gonna buy another thing that ah long suggest.. lol... SECRET!!! lol.. siao.. k la buaiz

(weihao_aka_bro1)
wish u faster recover and lemme psycho. dun wori le.. i try 2 settle myself k??
(pearl_aka_special one)
lol... happi birthdae la.. no cake mooncake can?? no mooncake chocolate cake can??
stay happy k and stay cute like toilet k?

missed you @ 5:47 AM

* * *



missed you @ 10:59 PM

* * *

fuck that... i am back!!!! its been a hard day... i was hacked two slashed but luckily not so deep.. my frend was beating til he cant walk. i was wonderful.... whoo!! whoo!! one on ten leh but as i was fighting i still was thinking of her. haiz... nvm wait lo... but i m grate 2 b back. cut my hair which is a muz thing. den tml going back class.. but stll thinking of her lo... den sumtimes think of that stupid pearl. hai... den think of my brother, wei hao. hai... luckily can cum back. gd enuff my hair short.

when i cum bac.. i first one 2 call is her. guess what, she sae i nv die ar?? my heart like the mirror brk brk brk til siao..hai heart die liao la... y she cant make me happi 4 a while de? hai.. reali need me 2 beg her meh?

sumtimes i feel dat my frend r more like stead 2 me. i rather dun wan sad. but can i help? hai... sian...

(wei hao_aka_bro1)
THANKS A LOT. ur mei de thing u no need worry. i nv like her.
(mai sei)
sorry 4 letting u worry
(carol)
its been a while since we talk le.
(xinhui_aka_lao mei)
anythin tell kor k. dun fan le, kor nw still can take alot of thing so better one shot all come k.

mayb u sae is correct. its urs its ur.. ty

missed you @ 10:30 PM

* * *

todae was quite a gd dae.. yesterdae fainted. cos oversick... so useless...
nw at thailand... very sian. here very spooky... likely gt blog. but still tinkin of her. why she nv msg back.
nvm.. mayb 1 dae i can gv her up.. this few daes make wei hao very ma fan. b coz of her mei de dai ji.. hai.. all my fault, if i nv msg her in e 1st place den nth will happen le.. hai.. all my fault.. feel that i done a lot of wrong things.
todae pei ah mei(xin hui) go cut hair... den saw her wit david like wat lidat.. hai.. cant understand.. i even cant understand myself la.. lol...
(weihao_aka_bro1)
sorry make u so ma fan and moody.... hai... very sori...
(xin hui_aka_ah mei)
if u feel he is not e one den keep 2 urself. if u like him juz go k.
(mai sei)
thanks 4 making me laugh
(pearl_aka_special 1)
e oreo is not enuff... still got more milk tea...
(carol)
dun always nv cum school i will miss u de.
(shiyun)
ah long very gd le... u can actually tell him what u dun like abt him n ask him try 2 improve lo... no one is prefact de ma.

missed you @ 8:45 AM

* * *

hai.. another day. todae late for school. but actualli i dun care la.. this few daes very moody. keep thinking of her... but no use. let her cool down... i dunno how long. i juz noe i keep on waiting , and one dae i will totally broke down. todae wei hao ask mi not 2 be too close to her mei(ah qi). quite right la... everytime c her will think of (her). todae keep thinking of her lo.. so foolish of me. den at VSM i was so engrossed at what teacher isdoing and teaching that i forget that i still miss her. teacher give us a brk. den i ask xn hui mei to come and pei me. den i zz at her shoulder. then suddenly dream of her. dream of those beautiful momment but suddenly sae she wanna leave me. den i wake up and cried. ha.. so useless.. todae saw pearl. ask her pei me go co-op. she ask if i smoke. i cant deny. den i sae i treat her sweet. den afternoon sae mr khoo. ask him 2 treat me chicken rice which he did. den go pe. while running, keep thinking of her. if she is alrite. hai.. k la.. gtg...
(wei hao_ aka_bro1)
sorry let u have so much ma fan. everytime cant help u but make u fan, wori and sad. very sorri.. about me and her de dai ji u dun care le k??
(mai sei)
thanks 4 helping me... i beginning 2 trust u
(carol)
not i dun see u as brother le. but u have ur thing 2 fan. so i dun wan u fan more le k?
(pearl_aka_special one)
u own me milk tea. it takes forever 2 return like dat leh
(xin hui_aka_lao mei)
dun let ppl mistaken le. u shud get wad i mean. i will try not 2 b sad. but i dunno when. thanks 4 companying me,
(suyu)
i know u r trying to help me. i knw ur heart. but sumtimes i dun wan de thing tends 2 happen.

missed you @ 7:39 AM

* * *

todae start school at 10am. wake up see my ma fuking black face. dunno what i done wrong. i wake up. bath le. go out of huse. first thing is called wei hao. b cos last few daes companying me he veri tired. scared he cant wake up. i call him he wake up le lucky... den reach school, take attendance. but teacher nv cum. nvm lo. i ask shin hui, suyu, shi yun and mai sei wanna run not? den we run 1 round and feel my speed reali increases. so all the training at gym reali pay off lo. so happi. den shin hui help hao 2 make blog. quite nice. hao happi ma?? den we decided 2 go play badminton. den i msg qi wanna meet not. she meet us at TIC. den she sae she wanna pirece hole. den i bring her go ah long de jie shop 2 pirece. den hao scare his ma will scold den i sae anything i undertake it lo. den go hao huse play mahjong. hee.. fun lo... den hao buy carrot cake 4 us 2 eat. den c ah qi sad sad moody de. den while on e way go hme. den i ask her wad happen. den as i guess. she miss her ex also. hai.. c her lidat i very sad also. den also miss my ex. around 8pm she msg me wat i doin. ask mi dun go thailand. but i have 2 go lo. pretending 2 b strong in front of her. hai... den msg qi ask her wat she doing?? den she sae she wan pirece another hole. but i sae cannot, hope she listen la. k la.. all take care.

missed you @ 7:40 AM

* * *

another dae. ya todae was quite great la. everyone happi.i juz wan my frends 2 be happi. ppl like wei hao, carol, yengling, wei xiang, shin hui and suyu. shi yun and ah qi. althou i still thinking of her but whats the point? my heart keep telling me there's more to the story. i dun wanna hear anybody to sae. i want her to sae her own lo. stubborn hor? anyway. todae wei hao go century square to cut hair including yengling and suyu. they went 2 e store named STORM. den i decided to ask shin hui to pei me go shop shop c c. we went to the singing store where we can record our own ablum. but too bad, i lack the courage. but next year if got tis type of competition i sure go de. den wei hao cut hair hao le. quite nice. but without styling den not nice lo. hee... den he company me go walk when we come to tis arcade. i saw that ZEN MICRO which i like a lot. hee.. den i waste $5 to ask wei hao help mi play. truely tis bro very gd. he let my heart pump til siao but nv get it. den we went to his huse 2 sing song. den thts when i knw ah qi got flu. hee.. den we sing and i ask ah qi 2 join. overall we quite happi. til i ask vanessa 2 sing a song which i like. thts when suyu cried and i secretly cried. worst still i sing wilber pan de wo lan ni zhou le. den think of her again haiz.. anyway guys, thank you we have a nice dae

missed you @ 7:15 AM

* * *

this few daes been thru a lot... all tis while been hurt. i always think there is sumtin more 2 e story. hope u can tell mi 1 dae. but nw, i will hav 2 wait. while waiting try 2 open my heart. i dun wan it 2 b a shadow in me. while missing i will find sumthin 2 do. u r hurt, me too. we share e pain. but as frend. leaving u was e toughest thing. but what can i do? if u b wit me u will get hurt den i rather myself being hurt den u. hope u will b happy.
(carol)
i think u noe my heart. thanks for being there, i noe u try 2 force me 2 face it bravely. but u shud noe i takes time.i will try my best.
(wei hao_aka_ brother 1)
hao, frm all, i need 2 thank u deeply. u help me alot. making it seems 2 be ur prob. making urself as sad as me. sori. i cant face it myself but need 2 pull u down as well. i think i need time. tis few daes u seems sad changed. anythin juz tell mi. i will try my best 2 help.sori 2 make u wori.
(yengling)
u try 2 ask. but sori sumtimes i cant tell much.
(weisiang_aka_close frend 1)
weisiang althou u have ur own prob but u try ur best 2 lend me a listening ear.thanks.i believe our frendship will last. u try 2 lighten my burden by asking me 2 give up. but... i didnt. mayb i sturbborn. anywae thanks.
(pearl_aka_special frend 1)
thanks 4 companying me. listening 2 all my craps. laugh with me. and wori 4 me. u r special enuff le... thanks.. but dun forget my milk tea.
(ah gal_aka_huijun)
ah gal, kor noe ur meaning. kor will try. u muz not turn bad. she is tryin veryhard 2 help u. kor too. anything cum tell kor k?
(steven_aka_clsoe frend 2)
thanks a lot 4 chatting with me althou u have ur own prob. i couldnt help but in turn u help me. thanks. dun gv up k? we jia you together.


everyone. thanks u.

missed you @ 11:56 AM

* * *

There's a thousand words that I could say
To make you come home
Oh, seems so long ago you walked away
Left me alone
I remember what you said to me
You were acting so strangeand maybe I was too blind to see
That you needed a change
Was it something I saidTo make you turn away?T
o make you walk out and leave me cold
If I could just find a way
To make it so that you were right here
But right now..I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strongI
've drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains..
You're gone..You're gone..Baby you're goneGirl you're gone, baby girl, you're gone..You're gone..You're...I don't wanna make excuses, baby
Won't change the fact that you're gone
But if there's something that I could do
Won't you please let me know?
Time is passing so slowly now
Guess that's my life without you
and maybe I could change my every day
But baby I don't want to
So I'll just hang aroundand find some things to do
To take my mind off missing you
and I know in my heart
You can't say that you don't love me too
Please say you do
Yeeaah....
I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
I Drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains
You're gone..You're gone..You're goneYou're gone...you're gone.. you're....GoneOhhh...Oh what'll I do
If I can't be with you
Tell me where will I turn toBaby where will I be
Now that we are apart
Am I still in your heart?
Baby why don't you see?
That I need you here with meOohhh...I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
I've drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains
Been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strongI drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remainsYou're gone..You're gone..You're goneYou're goneGoneYou're gone..
But the truth remainsYou're....

missed you @ 6:00 PM

* * *

wake up le. but still dun wish to think tht its another dae. wishing everything that happen was bluff.even carol call me. i dun wanna accept the call. i dun wanna accept the fact she brk with me le. what can i do? i stick on the bed till 5pm den stand up. keep laughing but?? in my heart i so sad. i dun wanna let go. can u come back 2 mi? can u take back ur words? can i hold ur hands again. my mind is very blur. i dunno who 2 trust. dunno who to talk 2. u sae u rarely can hug me. but nw? u dun even want 2. i still living in u. keep asking myself what i did wrong. did u ever miss me? can tell me? over the past few weeks. i was hoping you could hold me. when u hold me that dae. it was very close. i told myself after u i could not find another gal le. the hug was so tight that i know its was u that i was looking 4. m i bluffing myself? or i think too much? or m i replacement 4 him. if i was i can b replacement. reading this blog de ppl shud think i very foolish. but i knw my heart is with her. she took my heart away. so much so i dunno what i going 2 do without her. no strength le. thinking of ending my life straight. but i still hope 2 see her. it may hurt. but i m waiting 4 e day she come back and hold my hand. or even rest on my chest. she is e first gal 2 rest on my chest. did u remeber the dae on mrt? u rest on my chest and just doze off lidat. how i hope the time will stop just there. i wrote a song 4 u. but do i have the chance 2 sing it 2 u. i try my best 2 . but... who knows my pain?

missed you @ 5:26 PM

* * *

i was slping. i dream of she and me in a place that nv exist.a place where we can be together forever. my handphone ring. it was a msg from her. the first thing i saw was,"dear can u lemme cool down a while. dun blame urself its not ur fault." my mind went total blank. why? is there a problem between us? i ask what was the problem. she refuse 2 tell me. the third msg was,"can we brk awhile till my n lvl past? i dun wan so much things to fan and worry about. dun call me, just sae can or cant." as a man, i sae no. cos i noe hw important is she to. but? guess what. she sae why cant i understand her and just brk with her. do i have a choice nw? do i? i start to think that i am a burden to her. so much so that i hate myself. i asked if she wanna go home as she is outside and have no money to go home. she sae wan. but when i call her. she dun wan to hear. when i ask why. she sae she scared if she hear my voice she wont bear 2 leave me. but do i bear. i dun wan to brk or even end this relationship at all. but?? do i have a choice. i noe i cant coaxed my stead well. but why i not given a chance? do i reali need to go back to my past. so that u can c how i love u. when i meet u , den u sae u dun wan go home. joanne ask me to ton together. when we ton. i ask u 2 come over and pei me. u sae," wo shen mer dou bu xi wang zhi xi wang ni mei shi." realli ma?? i alread have a prob. my prob is how to make u come back 2 mi and tell mi ur prob. so i ask her to pei me take cab home. on the way i ask if i could hug her. as i hug her. i dun bear 2 let go. i have the feeling that tis is the last time i could hug her. m i thinking too much? but as i reach home. i could not get 2 slp. m i a coward? a coward that cant face the darkness in the lonely world. Girl, do u know u change my world compeletly? so much that i dunno how 2 live without u. u sae if during this time wen we break i have a crush on a gal juz go. how to?? i dunno. our song yan leh de wei dao. i know the taste. loneliness, scared, pain, hurt and waiting de bitteriness. i just wanna tell you no matter who try to stop us. i will go all the way just to hold your hand. how much i love u? i dunno. very hard to replace u in my heart. on the surface i may look ok. but do u know how much tears i dropped 4 u? do u realli want me to be back to the person in the past? u sae u cannot forget him yet. there is shadow of him in u. but i can slowly let u forget him. but why do we need 2 brk up? i dun wish 2 c u hurt. so i have no choice but to let you go. but the fact in my heart, i dun wish 2 let go. u sae u dun understand me. but why everything you do touches me deep in my heart. everything you do is what i want my stead 2 be. doesnt that mean understanding me?

missed you @ 6:30 AM

* * *

start school 5 daes le.. but still feel e teacher teaching chee bye sian.
dono y other teacher theory nt sian her one so sian. but anyway hope she
can merge with our class.
yup.david thanks ar. 4 helping me reform my blog. hee. carol, dun sad le.
wei hao, we still bro ar? yup... n dear. thanks 4 everything.

missed you @ 8:05 AM

* * *

boi
not working finding
17 years old
28 nov 1988
nino_775@hotmail.com
vanilla lover
strawberry lover
Hip hop lover
anti sianzation

adidas full set
bing bing watch
a drving liscense
my very own band
wang lee hong lastest album
new shoes from vans or dada
lots of new shirts and jeans

friend
friend
friend
friend
friend
friend

suyu

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